I never wrote about our trip to California for Thanksgiving. It was so so good. Everything was beyond our expectations. I remembered how much I love and miss California. We remembered how amazing San Diego is, and the time with our family and cousins, and friends was so good and precious. I love our family. 
Until just recently, we've been struggling with either keeping Axel in his bed the entire night, or getting him to stay in his bed until a decent hour in the morning. For crying out loud, there were a couple of nights this Fall when he woke up at 3:00 a.m. Ready to take on the day. We have no idea what was going on then. But we've realized that sleep training doesn't end after they quit being a baby.
We haven't completely solved the staying in bed issue. I have learned the solution, though, we just aren't consistent enough to make it happen. You just have to stick with your rules, and you have to be realistic. We normally say that any time after 6:00 a.m. is an allowable wake up time. He goes to bed at 6:00 p.m., and he needs 12 hours of sleep, so 6:00 a.m. Is reasonable. If Axel wakes up before then, he has to go back to bed. The big question, however, for the strong willed child is: "Or what??" How do you make a strong willed child go back to bed? It really is about consistency. Lead them back, sleep in the bed with them if you have to. You may fail the first couple of times, but if you are consistent, the kid will eventually accept that he should just go back to bed. Our strong-willed child meter tips the scales, and we've struggled with this for about a year and a half, and it's just now starting to bear fruit. So have hope! Be consistent, and be strong!
Food is another thing we've struggled with, like practically every other parent. Granted, Axel has always been a great eater, we've gone through more of a control and attitude phase regarding food. It didn't matter what we put in front of him, as soon as he saw it, he'd make the most hideous face, pretend to gag, fall out of his chair, and pretend he was dying. Just like I described. It was drama every night at our house at 5:00 p.m. And it wasn't that he didn't like food, it was that he wanted to have control over his food. He wanted to decide, because he knew that he was 4 and he had a voice to be heard and that we listened. However, that didn't mean that we had to give in and let him eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches every night. Instead, we negotiated. Being that Axel is basically a barbarian and needs extreme quantities of food to supply his high energy lifestyle, it didn't work to let him go to bed hungry. We tried that and it backfired on us when he consistently woke us up at 1:00 a.m. begging for food. Our rule was that if he didn't eat his dinner he didn't get to watch a show before bed. He gets to watch a show on tv in the morning after breakfast, and at night before bed. It was his luxury, his treat. So that was a big bargaining tool for us, and it worked pretty well. There have been several ugly tantrums here and there in between, but in general, we've been consistent with the rule, and it works. Now, there are still foods that he didn't want to try, but he'll at least try them. Another thing is that he is obsessed with being big and strong. So we tell him that he needs to eat his growing food if he wants to be big and strong. Cha-ching, that is working better and better.
This month I started leading a boot camp with my mom friends on my street. I kind of suggested we do it as a joke, and now they are so invested that we meet every Tuesday and Thursday morning after dropping the kids off at school! I like to yell things at them like "No weakness!" And "This isn't ballet class!" (I got that one from my UCLA gym trainer). Other times I just tell them that they can quit, but then they're not going to get buns of steel. Then I dangle a cookie in front of them as they push weight up a hill then throw the cookie away. Okay, all of these things are lies, but we joke about them being reality in the near future. But seriously, I have some badass Mom girlfriends. They never complain, they are always eager, and they're freaking tough!
Hockey is our new sport obsession. Since we now live in the north, and there are ice rinks at every street corner, it only makes sense that we play hockey. Plus, Axel's older friend plays hockey and he wants to be just like him. He started taking ice skating lessons in early December, and after a couple of weeks, he's already skating like a pro. He can definitely skate faster than me, but I've also just started learning. The other day he and Johan were trying to teach me how to stop, which is the hardest part of ice skating. It's terrifying, actually. But it's so easy for Axel. He kept showing me, saying "just like this, Mamma", it was really cute, and also humbling that my 4 year old was trying to teach me something that he was better at than me. At least it will be many years before he's better than Johan.
Sometimes it feels like he has so much frustration. I always have to wait it out, then we talk about it after, when he's calm, kiss, hug, and admit that we do actually love eachother. But then there are the nights when we're watching his show together on the couch before bed, and we snuggle and wrap ourselves together in a blanket, and he lets me wrap him like a burrito in a blanket and carry him to bed. Then I think "At least he doesn't hate me all the time". 
